DEAD END HORROR'S FIRST EVER SHORT STORY CONTEST! FREE TO ENTER!

Heya Dead End Horror sheep that drink cheap beer and fuck even cheaper hookers! We, at Dead End Horror, are proud to announce the first ever HORROR SHORT STORY CONTEST!  

We will be taking submissions from now up until October 31, 2011. It’s free to enter and even better than that, you can win $30 in free pizza! Who doesn’t want to win some free pizza?

Plus, we will feature your story right here at Dead End Horror. We have a pretty good fan base and this contest is a great way to get your work out there for others to read.
And also, you will retain all rights to your story and can request us to take it down at anytime.

Wanna know the rules and stuff?  Here they are:


RULES AND STUFF

Write a short story 1500-2500 words about anything you want as long as it’s in the horror genre. You can write about vampires, werewolves, zombies, monsters, ghosts, whatever you like just as long as it’s horror. No SCI-FI, NO FANTASY!

WE WILL NOT TAKE ANY SUBMISSIONS THAT USE RACIAL SLURS!  NO EXCEPTIONS! If you use racial slurs you’re a douche bag and we want no part of it.

NO KIDDIE PORN SHIT EITHER! If you write about that,  you’re a sick fuck and well...Don’t make me go there.

ORIGINAL WORK ONLY! If you steal other people’s shit and pass it off as your own, you’re a shitty writer anyway and most likely you wear your mom’s underwear. We want no part of you.

SUBMIT YOUR WORK IN RTF FORMAT

EMAIL AS AN ATTACHMENT to deadendhorror@yahoo.com
 In the body of your email include: Word Count, Title, and a 2-3 sentence summary of what your story is about. Oh yeah, make sure you write HORROR in the subject box of the email.

ALSO, PLEASE EDIT YOUR WORK!! Check for spelling, grammar, punctuation, and so on and so forth. WE AREN’T YOUR PERSONAL EDITORS!

I guess that about covers it all. We look forward to reading your work and we wish you the best of luck. If you have any questions, email them to deadendhorror@yahoo.com

GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN!!

PUT THAT BITCH ON ICE! BY: ZOMBIE ' CHODE' ZANE

Heya Dead End Horror sheep that hang out at the Booty Lounge and spend your rent and food money on junk food and greasy hamburgers! It’s Thursday and that means it’s that time once again for us to do what we do. So why not kick on back, put ya feet up, grab some greasy junk food and let me tell you about this movie I just got done watching.

Before I get to the post, why not watch the trailer first:

 “Bikini Girls on Ice.” No shit! I know, I know, another lame-ass horror film with half naked chicks getting hacked to bits by a demented killer. But, hey. Aren’t they all? Look, I know that there isn’t a shred of originality to be found in this film, but I was just in the mood for some mindless drivel. Plus I have very low standards so I’m rarely disappointed. But seriously, if you’re in the mood for a good old fashioned slasher flick, you could do a lot worse than this film.

 So here’s a bit of the particulars.  “Bikini Girls on Ice” is a 2009 American horror/slasher film directed by Geoff Klein. It stars Danielle Doetsch, Cindel Chartland, and Suzi Lorraine. Basically it’s full of wanna be porn stars. Anyway, it runs just about 80mins and can be found on Netflix under the horror section in recently added. So if you wanna dull your mind and lose a few I.Q. points, by all means finish reading this and head on over there.

Like I mentioned before, the plot is just like 1000 movies you’ve already seen but I’ll give you the brief rundown anyway. It’s about a group of chicks who find themselves stranded when their bus breaks down in bum fuck Egypt. Anywho, they make it over to this old, abandoned gas station where, (you guessed it) a killer starts killing them off one by one. Told you it’s fuckin’ predictable. But like I said, aren’t most of these kind of movies?

As for me, I didn’t hate it. Although I tried to. I have to admit, it was one of those movies that are so bad, it’s good. I wouldn’t necessarily watch this one again, not would I go out of my way to own it, but it was still worth 80mins of my day.

After careful debate and half a cigarette, I give this movie a 2.75 out of 5. I mean it’s just a bit better than middle of the road. Like I said, there are a shitload of slasher films out there that are complete piles of fuck. Steaming piles of fuck! But this one, not so bad.

Well, that’s all the news that’s fit to print. Sorry this post is so short but I’ve been doing some work for Yahoo and my poor little pea-brain is all but fried. Before I go, be sure and check back tomorrow. Sasha and I have an announcement that may interest you. We’re gonna be holding a short story contest so you may wanna look into how to enter and the rules and whatnot. So stay tuned.

On that note, take care, stay a-scared, and I am out! Peace peace and fair-food eating grease! 

Zombie Zane

                                        

ZOMBIES, SEX, AND...MORE NECROPHILIA?? By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey all you necrophiliacs out there!! EWWW!! That was gross right??? Good. Sasha Slaughter here with you for the final time this week...and this month too! Today I'll be going gross on y'all, I hope you like it =). I'll be reviewing, “ Masters of Horror Episode 12: Haeckel's Tale.” (also known as Clive Barker's Haeckel's Tale). George A. Romero was originally supposed to direct the episode but was replaced by John McNaughton due to a scheduling conflict. It was written by Mick Garris and was based on a Clive Barker short story first published in the anthology series “Dark Delicacies: Original Tales of Terror and the Macabre.”

The story is set in the late 19th century and begins with a young man named Edward Ralston. He goes to an old woman named Miz. Carnation, who lives in an old cabin deep in the woods. Ralston asks Miz. Carnation, who happens to be a necromancer, to revive his recently deceased wife. Miz. Carnation refuses and decides to tell him the story of Ernst Haecke.

She tells him that if he still wishes his wife to be revived after hearing the story, she will grant his wish. The tale begins with medical student Ernst Haeckel, who is trying to follow in the footsteps of Victor Frankenstein, and his quest to bring the dead back to life. He argues with his professor the existence of God and says he can prove he can bring the dead to life.

His professor agrees to watch the demonstration at Haeckel's lab. When the professor and other students arrive they see a dead naked woman on a table with various metal things attached to her. Haeckel flips a switch and harnesses the power of lightning to electrocute the woman back to life. The woman is electrocuted and then quickly catches fire. Everyone laughs at his desperate attempt and leaves.

Chester brings in another body to Haeckel and he tells him that he doesn't want it because he's failed and cannot figure out how to bring the dead back to life. Chester suggests that Haeckel goes to see a necromancer named Montesquino at a nearby park who claims he can raise the dead. Haeckel is skeptical and doesn't believe that the man can do such a thing. Chester tells him he's seen it with his own eyes and that he should see for himself.

That night Haeckel goes to see Montesquino in the park to see if he can really revive the dead. Montesquino says he has a non-believer in the crowd and offers to demonstrate his powers. He shows the crowd a dead dog in a basket and tells him he will bring it back to life. He starts saying some sort of spell and there is barking and whining coming from the basket. He lifts the lid and the dog is alive.

Later that night while he is still in utter shock, Haeckel decides to visit Montesquino and asks him to show him how to bring the dead back to life. Montesquino tells him no because it took years to master the craft and that he can tell Haeckel is a non-believer. The following morning Haeckel receives a letter from his fathers doctor saying that he is very ill and only has days left. He decides to go visit him and sets off on foot.

 He walks all day and night when it starts to rain. He takes cover over an old oak tree and starts a fire. A man finds him and introduces himself as Wolfram and offers to let Haeckel stay in his home for the night to get out of the rain. He tells Haeckel is it unwise to stay outside and Haeckel demands to know why it is unwise. Wolfram tells him that because he is young he probably doesn't fear the workings of the world and that there are nights when it's good not to sleep next to a place where the dead are laid to rest. He moves the tree branch and shows him what he calls Necropolis.

He takes Haeckel back to his house and introduces him to his young wife Elise. Haeckel is instantly attracted to her and she feels the same way. During dinner Wolfram asks Haeckel if he has ever been in love, and Haeckel tells him only fleetingly. He then asks Haeckel is he has ever experienced physical love. Haeckel is offended and lets Wolfram know that he crossed the line.

He apologizes and Haeckel says that he is tired. He is lying in bed and sees Elise staring out the window and touching herself through her clothes (Someone needs to diddle!). She catches him staring at her and stops touching herself but continues staring out the window. Some time later he awakens and sees Wolfram handing Montesquino money and shortly after he sees Elise in the kitchen nursing a baby. Just then he hears a piercing scream coming from the woods. Elise goes to leave and Wolfram asks if she has to go and she runs out the door.

Wolfram begins crying when Haeckel comes out of his room to see what’s going on. It is then that Wolfram tells him that he cannot satisfy his wife and that Haeckel himself wouldn't be able to either. Haeckel brings up the fact that they have a child but Wolfram tells him that it's not his, and that the baby's father is dead. He tells Haeckel that he has sold everything he can so his wife can be satisfied.

Haeckel is confused and runs out the door to follow the screams he hears in the necropolis. Wolfram catches up with him and pleads with him not go and find Elise and tells him that he doesn't understand. He tells him that Elise is in love with her first husband and always will be. Haeckel goes into the necropolis and cannot believe what he's seeing- he sees Elise having sex with a corpse whom Wolfram tells him is Elise's dead husband.

Wolfram ties to tell Elise that it is time to go home, but some of the corpses attack and kill him. Haeckel demands that Montesquino stop what’s happening but he tells him he can't. Angry and frustrated, Haeckel shoots the necromancer as he tries to escape.

He tells him one last time to make it stop and he tells Haeckel that it will stop when the sun comes up and there's no other way. Before he dies, Montesquino slams Haeckel into a tomb and he is knocked unconscious. The following morning Haeckel wakes up and goes back to the cabin and finds Elise nursing a baby, and she asks Haeckel to hold him. He hesitates and she shoves the baby into Haeckel's chest and the baby rips out his throat...........

WOW!!! What a sadistic little corpse zombie baby. Yikes! If you wanna know the rest, check out “Masters of Horror: Haeckel's Tale.” But I will say, if you don't like gore or horror or necrophilia for that matter, I wouldn't recommend this episode.

I don't even know where to begin! This episode was AHHHHHMAZING!! It had everything a girl could ask for...blood, guts, boobs, necrophilia (not that I'm into that or anything), death, and a homicidal zombie baby. It was AWESOME!! Ahhhh!!! The plot was freaking incredible. Mick Garris is a true horror genius!

This episode had zombies, necrophilia, intestines, sex, blood, black magic and gore all crammed into one hour...genius I tell you! And the ending sort of blew my mind, I never saw it coming at all. The special effects were great, the acting was decent and the story itself is just all kinds of disturbing. I mean, a hot chick boinking zombies in a graveyard every night from sunset to sunrise and liking it??? WOW!!!Just thinking about that give me the wiggins.

Although I'm not too crazy about the corpses being fertile and able to procreate, that's kinda not believable. It's like vampires having sperm and being able to reproduce...WHAT?? It doesn't make sense! But we're not talking about vampires here, we're talking about a girl fornicating with the dead...isn't that illegal??

Hmm. Anyway, I'm gonna give Haeckel's Tale a solid 5 out of 5. I usually never score anything a 5, but this episode was gross and awesome and disturbing and I like stuff like that. I definitely may watch this again in the future!! Since you're here reading about getting it on with corpses, how about going to see what Zane's got going on??? It may not involve zombie sex, but it will probably still be gross. Thanks for stopping by Dead End Horror.

Sasha Slaughter

                                                                  

WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF AIDS BY: ZOMBIE ZANE

"So whatta we dooin' for your birthday tonight, bruh?"  Marco said as he put the finishing touches on his joint.

Watching Marco blaze up is disturbing.  His face scrunches up, his eyes water profusely, and he makes a nasal sound like he's trying his hardest to blow one huge booger out of his nose.  Not a pretty sight.
   
"You look like a retard when you smoke bruh.  Just wanted to let ya know.  I bet you give all the girls wetties."  I said.

 "Blow me.  Your mom don't seem to mind.  She still comes over every  weekend."  Marco said as he put the joint to his lips.
   
I grabbed my crotch with one hand, and shot him the finger with the other.  "Whatever. "
   
"So," Marco said, "are you down to bounce tonight?  It's a special night my brotha'.  You're twenty-one now, it's all legal now kid."
   
"Man, yeah, I'm down, always down.  I gotta have dinner with Rae and her folks first though."
   
"Sweet, my man.  Sweet.  Wanna hit of this?  This is some vile weed kid, fuck you up."  Marco said as he held the joint out in my direction.
   
"Naw, I'm good, none for me.  I gotta bolt.  Call me this evening with the details aiight."
   
"Late," Marco said as we dabbed our fists.

Dinner with Rae and her folks went about as expected.  Even though it was my birthday, I let her pick the place. And of course she picked her favorite place, which happened to be one of the noisiest restaurants in the city.  The food was good though so I didn’t mind the racket. Rae and I barely spoke during dinner.  She was pissed at me because she knew I would be going out to the club with Marco after.  She despised Marco. She had all kinds of choice phrases to describe him.  Her favorite, and I quote, “douche bag.”
   
In a way she was right to dislike Marco. I had known Marco almost all of my natural life.  He was arrogant, a high-school drop-out and was always in trouble with the law or a bookie.  Marco was also a professional drug dealer.  And he was very good at his job.  He had done things that I knew were horrible and of bad moral standing, but what can I say, he was my best friend and I loved him like a brother.

"Jackie, why do you hang out with Marco?  He's a shit-bag.  He's a drop-out, pot head and he has no future.  I mean you have great things ahead of you. And Marco is gonna drag you down with him if you don't watch out.  You're so much better than that, baby.  I love you and I care about what happens to you."
   
"Rae, c'mon huh? It's my birthday. It’s just one night of drinkin’. It ain’t gonna hurt nuttin.”
   
"Why do you talk like that? You have an education, you're not Marco.  Every time you hang out with him, you come back talking like some street thug,  So please Jackie, spare me the street talk."
   
My phone chirped to life inside my pocket.  I took it out and looked at the screen.  It was Marco.  "Hang on baby, I gotta take this."  I flipped open my phone and took a few steps away from Rae so I could be sure to be out of her auditory range.

 "Marco, what up bruh?"
   
"Hey my man, you bout ready to bounce or wha?"  Marco said.
   
"Yeah, I'm good, but I gotta do a little bit of girlfriend maintenance first."
   
"Oh snap!"  Marco said.  "She's breakin your balls huh?  Oh, Jackie, stay at home, don't go out. Please pretty please, put your balls in my purse and let me keep them for you!  That's funny shit huh?  I just cracked my ownself up on that one.  C'mon, you gotta gimmie props on that, that was classic!"
   
"Ha-ha, funny.  Where and when shit-heap?"

 "O'Bannons.  Ten-thirty.  I got a surprise for ya ass.  Zee ya there, I'm out."
   
I still had a good piece of work to do before I could leave Rae feeling better.  I never liked leaving things unresolved between her and I.  I could never truly have a good time if I knew we were at odds.  It would eat away at me.  Having her mad at me was like being pecked to death by chickens.  I loved the girl.  I truly did.  And if I would've known that this was going to be the last time that I would ever see her again, I would've relished it.        

The club was absolutely jumping.  O'Bannons was packed with wall to wall people.  All of who were grinding to the sonorous beats that vibrated the floor.  Copious amounts of smoke hung in the air like a dead man.  It was a veritable din of sin.

 "Happy Birthday my brotha!" Marco said as he greeted me at the bar.
   
"Thanks bruh, I need a drink.  Hell, I need a few.  That shit with Rae’s got me all geeked.  I love her, but she has her overbearing ways."
   
"No more girlfriend talk.  I rented the VIP Room and we got stuff do to.  And it don't revolve around ya girl.  Let's head up there, it's crowded like a muthafucka’ up in this bitch.".
   
"Here we be dawg, the VIP!"  Marco said as he pushed the two double doors open that led to the inner sanctum of the club.  I'd been to the club a dozen times with Marco, but never to the VIP Room.  He'd gone all out.  I felt honored.
   
"This place is tight! Damn, man.  I don't know what to say to ya."
   
"Don't need to say nuttin.  It's your twenty-first.  My treat.  We gonna sit back, pound some bitter, toot some lines and get real nice.  Then, I gotta little summick extra fa ya.  You gonna dig it fo sho baby, fo fuckin sho."

 The two of us laughed and drank and drank some more.  My head was swimming and I had two false eyes when Marco jumped up and ran to the door.  "Sit tight a sec man, part two of your surprise is comin right up."
   
She was tall, and had curves in all the right places.  I knew she was a pro, but I didn't care.  Her name was Yasmine.
   
Yasmine and I left the club hand in hand and departed to the hotel room that Marco had arranged for us.  God bless him, he thinks of everything.
   

I did my best to act cool around Yasmine.  She was one of those girls that no matter how cool you thought you were, or how attractive you thought you were, just sitting next to her made you feel inferior.  I couldn't take my eyes off of her.  I'd been with beautiful women before, but she was different.

Upon entering the hotel room, Yasmine wasted little time in getting down to business.  The hotel room was nothing special.  Thick drapes made out of the same material as the bedspread hung in the windows obscuring the view from any curious people who happened to walk by on their way to the ice machine or the vending machines.
   
Yasmine pushed me down on the bed and began to gyrate her hips to the tune of whatever phantom music she had going on in her head.  She removed her dress with one quick motion.  She moved with such ease and grace it was almost unnatural.  Her nipples were set in small pink circles and they jutted out like tiny red thumbs.

  She turned around so that her back was facing me. She bent way over as she slid the small piece of white lycra down her thighs to her ankles.  As she turned around to face me again, I noticed that her pubic hair was trimmed in the shape of a heart.  She was almost too beautiful to take in all at once.  My heart skittered and skipped. I was headed toward sensory overload.
   
Yasmine slowly swayed over to me and removed my pants.  She began doing things down there that I had only seen on internet porn sites.  Her warm tongue glided up and down the length of my shaft before she took me all the way into her mouth.  My cock grew so much I was afraid I was going to run out of skin.
   
We made love...not love...we fucked.  Pure and simple.  Rea and I make love, this was the polar opposite.  There was no love behind any of it.  Just sheer unadulterated sex.  It was the best I'd ever had.

The next morning, I awoke alone and to a pounding headache.  I was naked and I had the worst case of morning wood ever.  I staggered out of bed and performed the old-man shuffle all the way to the bathroom.  What a night.
   
I reached the bathroom and flicked on the light.  The large rectangle fluorescent lights flickered once and illuminated the bathroom.  I went over to the toilet and did my business.  After flushing, I put the seat down and walked over to the sink.  And that's when I saw it.  A shot of adrenaline pulsated throughout my body.  My heart fell to the pit of my stomach and began to beat like a lunatic.  My thoughts spun out of control and I couldn't reign them in. I felt weak kneed and lightheaded.
   
"Oh God," I wailed as I looked at the mirror again in horror.  Scrawled on the mirror in bright red lipstick were the words:

WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF AIDS! HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY! LOVE JASMINE :P

CANNIBAL CREEPER By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey there horror fans who are addicted to our blog and search for "Sasha Slaughter naked" on the Internet (Ok, so I kinda stole that from Zane <3). Sasha Slaughter here with you, and no, I'm not naked...sorry to disappoint. Anyway! Today I'll be seducing your peepers with a review of the 1972 film Raw Meat.

It was written and directed by Gary Sherman. And here's something you may or may not know, the film was originally called Death Line but it was distributed as Raw Meat in the United States. And I've got one more nugget of info to share with you! This movie is a take on a gruesome urban legend from the British Isles. Legend has it that it was based on a family that was forced into cannibalism and liked it. They became insular (living on an island) because of their cannibalistic ways and because they were insular, they also became inbred as well. Ewwww!  Enough about inbred, let’s talk about the movie.

 In 1892 a group of workers got trapped under the streets of London after a tunnel cave in. They are forced to survive on their own. The company they were working for went bankrupt and couldn't afford to dig the bodies out, so they were abandoned. The survivors, four men and four women, were forced to live off of the flesh of their dead. And now that they have all died, the sole descendant of the survivors resurfaces to satisfy his appetite for the living.

James Manford, a respected politician is walking around town checking out various peep shows. He's at the train station on his way home when he tries to proposition a hooker. She gets upset that he wont pay her until she services him and kicks him in the nads and runs. Manford is trying to recover when he sees something and starts to panic.

 Later on Patricia and her American boyfriend Alex are getting off of the train when they find the politician on the stairs of the train station. Patricia insists that they help him and Alex believes the man is drunk and wants to leave him. They find a constable and tell him about the man on the stairs. Alex takes the constable to the check on the man but when they get there the man is gone.

Back at the station, Rogers and Calhoun are talking about the train station and how the tunnel caved in 1892 and the bodies were never recovered because the company went bankrupt and couldn't afford to dig them out. They notice a pattern of people going missing in the same train station as Manford and want to know more. Back at the tunnels, in the train station, a diseased riddled creeper is kneeling above his sick mate. He knows something is wrong so he takes Manford's body and slits his throat so she can drink his blood.

 In the train station Patricia is waiting for the next train with her suitcase when she decides to go back to Alex. As she is getting on the train to go back to Alex, the creepers mate dies and he freaks out and leaves the tunnels. He finds people in the station and they try to fight them off. The creeper splits a mans head open with a shovel and impales another with a broom handle. He drags the third man off to his home in the tunnels.

Calhoun and Rogers are called early in the morning and told about the murders in the train station. They arrive at the morgue and inspect the bodies of the two men attacked and killed. They are told that one is missing and that there is a possible fourth man because they recovered blood on the handle of the broom that didn't belong to either of the two victims. Calhoun decides to ask Alex to come back for further questioning about Manford and when he doesn't hear what he wants, he quickly dismisses him. One of the doctors from the morgue calls Calhoun shortly after Alex leaves to tell him that they are sure that there was a fourth man in the train station and that they tested his blood and found that the man has the plague and is very sick.

 Alex and Patricia are getting off a train after a date and Patricia leaves her books on the train. Alex runs into the train to get them when the doors close. She tells him that she will meet him at home. As she starts to leave the station the creeper comes up behind her and drags her into the tunnels. When Alex returns home to an empty apartment, he immediately knows that something is wrong.

Patricia wakes up and realizes she is locked away in a room. She sees rats all around her and starts screaming. The creeper comes into the room and kills and bites some of the rats while Patricia hides under a table. He drags her out and lays her on a make shift bed. He tries to calm her down and hug her when she hits him and then runs away.

Meanwhile back at the train station Alex gets off of the train and decides to explore the tunnels in search of Patricia. He eventually finds her and tries to talk to her and touch her face but she keeps slapping his hands away and screaming. He gets frustrated that she won't cooperate so he rips her shirt (brief boob shot alert!!) and she starts to scream. The creeper runs away and Alex hears Patricia's screams and calls out to her. She keep calling for him to help her and he finds her laying on the ground. He goes to help her up when the creeper runs toward him and...

And then????? If you'd like to find that out, then mosey on over to Netflix and watch Raw Meat. I'm not really sure what to think of this movie. It was definitely strange. It was supposed to be gory, scary, and violent...but I didn't see much of that at all. The movie took forever to get even remotely interesting.

The first few minutes of the movie was some guy walking around looking into the camera while some cheesy porno music played. It sort of seemed irrelevant to the movie a little. In fact there where a few scenes that I thought were kind of that way but, what do I know?

There was some blood and a little gore, but I expected more. They made it sound a lot gorier in the description of the movie. There was a part in the tunnels where they showed a few bodies in various stages of decomposition, which I thought was cool. But there was also a part in the tunnels where they panned around the room for 10 minutes and all you heard was dripping water and what sounded like a heart beat. That was sort of annoying.

 And the creeper was supposed to be a descendant of cannibals, well I really didn't see him eat anyone. I was sitting there thinking EAT SOMEONE ALREADY!! He had a bunch of dead bodies in his little tunnel home thinger, but it never really showed him eating anyone. He killed a few people, but I was waiting for him to eat them. I was sort of disappointed by the cannibal guy.

He acted too civilized to be believable (He lit lanterns and cried). He was supposed to have been raised in the tunnels and I was kind of expecting someone a little more dumb. He couldn't talk and he did look really gross. They did an exceptional job on special effects of the sores and disease on the cannibals face. But that was best part about him, the way he looked. He was a drooling, disease infested freak...that didn't eat anyone. BOO!!

The best part of the movie was inspector Calhoun. He was a riot!! He was always bitching about wanting tea and when he got it he'd dig the tea bag out of his cup with a dart. It was too funny! He was really sarcastic and cynical and when he swore at someone, he whispered it. That made me laugh. Overall I'd give Raw Meat a 2.5 out of 5. I was gonna give it a 2, but that inspector guy made me giggle, so I bumped up the score a little.

There was some cussing (but the guy whispered when he swore, which was funny) and an incredibly brief boob shot. Nothing special really. I doubt I'd watch this movie again. So now that I'm done here, you can go and see what Zane's got going on in his part of the world. I'm almost sure it might involve boobs or dingus, since I guess we need more of that...=). Thanks for stopping by Dead End Horror.

Sasha 'not naked' Slaughter

                                                                             

NAKED PUKING WHORES! BY: ZOMBIE 'UPCHUCK' ZANE

Hello Dead End Horror sheep that stay up all night searching for Sasha Slaughter naked with a glob of lotion in your palm. You bunch of fuckin’ pervs! You oughtta be ashamed of yourselves! But by the way, if you do happen to come across some of those pics, feel free to email me at zombiezane@...Wait, I’m no pervert! Well...kinda I am. But that’s beside the point. Let’s get into today’s post, yes?

I don’t have any nude Sasha Slaughter pics, but I do have some nudity to share with you. Wanna see? Here ya go! It’s me, Zombie Zane in the buff! I’m fuckin’ hot ain’t I?

 Ok, on to the movie.  Now this movie I wanna tell you about has plenty of nakedness in it. It also has a shitload of gore too. So what’s not to like? Nudity + Puking up Blood = “The Slaughtered Vomit Dolls!” Have you heard of this fuckin’ thing? No? Well, I guess you better kick on back and let me tell ya a little about it.

“Slaughtered Vomit Dolls,” is a shock/horror movie directed by Lucifer Valentine. (Yeah, right. Not the dude’s real name.) But whatever. Anyway, this shock/horror film is one of three in Valentines gore-fest series. I have no clue what the other two titles are, but I’m sure if you do some digging you’ll find them.

So this film runs just about 71 minutes, it was released on video in 2006 and it stars a bunch of fuckin’ people I’ve never heard of. Like: Allen Nasty, Miss Pussy Pants, Pig Lizzy and...fuck this! These names are too stupid to even type. Obviously these guys are just too school for cool. They should've spent more time making this film and less time coming up with cool names.

Wanna know the plot? Well, that makes two of us. I’m not sure what this movie is really about. It has a ton of gore, a lot of puking, some stupid fucking satanic music, and a ton of nudity. What I was able to get from the film breaks down like this: Basically it’s about a 19 year old bulimic stripper that decides to become a whore. And well, that’s about all that I got from this film. Needless to say, this was one big pile of fuck!

 Now lookit, I dig gore and nudity and shit like that just as much as the next guy.  But this, this was just too retarded for me. Like I know the director was all about trying to shock, which he failed at by the way. “I Spit on Your Grave” was ten times more shocking than this fuck pile.

Like I said, it did have plenty of gore and plenty of boobs, but all I can give this film is a 1 out of 5. No amount of tits and gore could’ve helped this movie. But like if you’re not used to seeing shocking horror, than by all means, go give it a look. I mean it might like shock you. As for me, I’ve seen a ton of horror and it takes a shitload to shock your old buddy, Zombie Zane.

On that note, that’s all I got for you today. Be sure and check out Sasha’s stuff as well. I think she’s doing something with raw meat so grab some meat and go pay the busty (but not naked) Sasha Slaughter a visit. Until next time, take care, stay a-scared, and I am out. Peace peace and naked puking grease!

Zombie Zane

READY FOR A HOWLIN GOOD TIME?? By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey horror fans!! Sasha Slaughter here with you for the final week of September...can you believe September is almost over?? But the good news is that October is quickly approaching, and we all know what October means..HALLOWEEN!! It's me and Zane's favorite, and we are sure to be bringing you some screams!!! But more on that later. Now it's time to get to the task at hand. Today for your reading pleasure I'll be reviewing, “Fear Itself Episode 9: Something with Bite.”  It was written by Max Landis and directed by Ernest Dickerson.

Now this should be episode 7 but it's actually episode 9, so bear with me. And I don't know why, but for some reason they aren't numbered right on Netflix. And here's a little info for you, NBC stopped airing Fear Itself after the eighth episode. There were 13 episodes in season 1, but only eight of them aired on television. Episodes 9-13 were produced but never aired in the United States. But you can find all 13 episodes on dvd and Netflix, so check that out! Now let's get to it!

 “Something With Bite,” is a story of veterinarian Wilbur Orwell, who works in an animal clinic with his employee Mikayla and Geoff. Dr. Orwell is a lazy slob that does half ass work and eats a lot (num nums!!!). When an unknown animal gets brought into his clinic, Dr. Orwell examines it and a man tells him that he hit it and decided to bring it to his clinic.

When trying to tend to the animal, he finds a collar with the name Michael on it. Suddenly, Dr. Orwell gets bitten by it and then the animal quickly dies. After he's bitten, Dr. Orwell feels ill but the following morning upon waking, he feels like a whole new person. He finds that he no longer has a taste for junk food and also has incredibly heightened senses.

 He goes to work on examining the body of the beast and finds that it has pierced ears and a filling in it's mouth. He finds Mikayla at the reception desk talking to a distraught couple. They introduce themselves as Crane and Moonflower Dougdale (Sounds like hippies to me). The Dougdale's tell Dr. Orwell that they are looking for their son, which they quickly correct and say they are looking for their animal. They say he went missing and fear he's been hit by a car. Orwell takes them to an exam room and shows them Michael's body. They plead with Orwell to please let them have the body so they can do a proper burial and Dr. Orwell reluctantly agrees.

After the couple leaves, Dr. Orwell calls lazy employee Geoff, who rarely shows up for his job. Geoff tells him that things have come up but promises he will be in the following day. Later that night, Orwell's arm starts to itch and he removes the bandage to discover that the bite has healed. He starts twitching and screaming and turns into a werewolf.

 He runs from his house and finds Geoff walking alone on the street. He jumps out in front of Geoff and kills him. He wakes up the next day and finds muddy paw prints leading from the window to the bed. He goes to work and is later questioned by an FBI agent about the death of his employee Geoff. The agent shows Orwell crime scene photos of Geoff's various body parts scattered around the crime scene. Orwell gets nervous and realizes that he may have been the cause of Geoff's death.

Orwell goes to visit the Dougdale's to talk to them about what happened. He tells Moonflower he's there to pay his condolences to Michael. He then looks at her and smiles and his eyes turn yellow. She smiles back at him and her eyes turn bright green. They are sitting down talking when Crane asks Wilbur if he's been able to control the change. Wilbur tells him he thinks he's able to now but then asks if it's possible to kill people in his wolf form. Crane tells him that he wouldn't do anything as a wolf that he wouldn't do as a man. Comforted by this, he then asks if they are the ones responsible for the recent string of animal attack deaths. They deny being involved and tell him that they are vegans. Crane then tells him that there are others out there like them who are less well behaved.

 Back at the clinic, Mikayla is getting ready to leave for the night when she is attacked by a wolf but survives. Orwell goes to visit her and the FBI agent shows up. He tells Orwell that she's lucky she’s still alive and that there was a patrol car right up the road from where she was attacked. Orwell starts acting strange and sniffing at Mikayla and quickly leaves the room.

He follows the scent to an abandoned warehouse where he transforms into a werewolf and meets a man named Forest J. Caldwell. Caldwell keeps telling Orwell that he is beautiful and that he has been waiting all his life to be changed. He keeps telling Orwell to bite him but Orwell never moves. Caldwell admits that he's the one who has been killing people in hopes of attracting attention from a werewolf. He shows Orwell the outfit he made of fur and razor sharp claws. Orwell still doesn't respond and when Caldwell mentions Mikayla and the fact that he didn't have a chance to kill her and that he was thinking of going to the hospital to do it, Orwell rips him apart and....

 Ohh nooo!!! And then what?? If you really want to know, go to Netflix and watch “Fear Itself: Something with Bite.”  This episode was ok I guess. Orwell got on my ever loving nerves. I can't quite put my finger on it, but he bothered me. The acting was a smidge over the top, especially the acting of Wilbur's wife Patty...that woman was horrible. Ughh!!!

There wasn't a whole lot of blood, but there was a few severed body parts, which is always a plus! And the werewolf thing was a little creepy, but it looked too fake. The hippies were kind of strange. And the guy hippie...eww his eyebrows got on my nerves. I wanted to take some hot wax to those bad boys!!!

Overall I'd give “Something to Bite” a 2 out of 5. I was kind of bored throughout the whole thing and wasn't very intrigued by what was happening. And the ending was totally LAME!!! It definitely could have been better. I doubt I'd ever watch this episode again. Once was enough, for sure!! And since you're here, how about you go see what Zane's got going on?? Whatever it is, I'm sure it'll blow your minds. Trust us. We're professionals.

Sasha Slaughter