Stay off the Moors By: Sasha Slaughter

Aww yeah, it's me again! How are you all you freaks out there doing? Thanks for stopping by today to see what's going on. I'll be keeping with the theme of "Shit I haven't seen" week, and I'll be telling you a little about the movie An American Werewolf in London. That again is shit I haven't seen. I wasn't even born when the movie came out. NEW SCHOOL! 

An American Werewolf in London is a 1981 horror film that was written and directed by John Landis. And here's a bit of info, the late Michael Jackson said that An American Werewolf in London was the reason he wanted Landis to work with him on his music videos for Thriller and Black and White. Who knew?? And in June in 2009, it was announced that a remake of the film was in the works, but has since been delayed due to other commitments. Let me watch it and tell you a little about it!

The film begins with two American friends, David and Jack, on a backpacking holiday in England. The men find a village pub but once inside, they realize they are not wanted there, and quickly leave. The men tell them to stay on the road and away from the moors. The two venture deep into the moors at night and hear strange noises that are dangerously close to them. They are attacked by a werewolf, which results in Jack's death and David being taken to a nearby London hospital. Shortly after, David begins seeing disturbing apparitions of Jack and having strange dreams. Jack tells David that when the next full moon comes David will transform into a werewolf and kill innocent people. He then tells David that his living-dead victims will wander in limbo until the last bloodline of the wolf is destroyed, meaning that David must die.

RAWR!!!!!!! I must say, I was really impressed with this movie. I am totally new school, but I enjoyed watching it. There was a mix of comedy and horror, and the music they played...it was perfect, it totally fit what was happening. I know I banged on John Landis before, because let's face it, Deer Woman sucked. But I think I might like him just a little bit now. He has redeemed himself. I have to say, the werewolf transformation scene was amazing. It was so creepy! Some parts were a tad cheesy, but for the most part it was incredible. I said the werewolf scene in Trick r' Treat was the best, I stand corrected.

The corpse of Jack was actually pretty entertaining, and he got creepier and creepier each time that he showed up. The special effects make up was phenomenal. Of course nowadays it's a bit dated, but still great nonetheless. 

Overall I'd give An American Werewolf in London a 3.5 out of 5. I was impressed with the special effects and the gore factor. I think that this just may be my new favorite werewolf movie. And I absolutely would watch this again...many times. Since you're checking out my stuff, go see Zane too, he loves company. Thanks for stopping by DEH.

CHARLIE BROWN IS AN ASSHOLE! By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey there, hi there ho there...again! It's your good friend Sasha Slaughter && I'll be reviewing the movie, “Trick 'r Treat” for you freaks and geeks! Trick 'r Treat is an American horror film that was written and directed by Michael Doughtery and it was based on his short film, “Season's Greetings.” The film was supposed to be released in in 2007 but was pushed back and was eventually released straight to DVD and Blu-ray on October 6, 2009.

“Trick 'r Treat” is an anthology of four Halloween related stories. The one thing they have in common that ties the stories together is Sam, a mysterious pint sized trick or treater wearing shabby orange pajamas and a burlap sack over his head. He appears in all four stories as a friendly reminder to those who break Halloween tradition. Here we go!

The story begins with married couple Emma and Henry who have just returned from a Halloween party. They've set up numerous ghost-scarecrows for Halloween in their yard. On the way into the house, Emma tries to blow out one of the jack-o'-lantern's by the fence and Henry tells her not to do it because it's against tradition. Emma blows it out anyway and starts bitching about all of the decorations and how they need to be taken down before her mother gets there in the morning.

Henry says he'll do it tomorrow but Emma tells him he'll sleep all day and play video games so she'll do it herself. Henry goes inside to wait for Emma to come to bed. Emma is outside taking down the scarecrows and as she begins to take one down, an unknown assailant attacks her and slits her throat with a knife-like pumpkin lollipop. Henry falls asleep and wakes up sometime later. He notices that Emma isn't with him and goes outside to find....

Our second story takes us into the world of Steven Wilkins, the school principal who moonlights as a serial killer. Wilkins comes home to see Charlie, a neighborhood boy, on his porch stealing candy. Mr. Wilkins tells him it's ok and tells Charlie to stay a while. Charlie eats the stolen candy while Wilkins talks about the tradition of Halloween. Shortly after eating the candy, Charlie begins to vomit copious amounts of blood.

Wilkins tells him that here is another tradition that people forget about Halloween, and that's to check their candy before they eat it. Wilkins drags Charlie's dead body into his house and into the backyard. He buries Charlie, along with another dead body, in his yard but soon has a run in with his neighbor Mr. Kreeg. The neighbor asks what Wilkins is doing and jokingly asks if he is hiding dead bodies.

He then asks why Wilkins is in a hole in the backyard. He tells Kreeg that they are having septic problems and Kreeg asks if that was why their backyard smells like a dead whore. Mr. Wilkins finishes burying the bodies and goes into the house where his son Billy asks if they can carve a pumpkin now. Wilkins takes him into the basement and on the table is....

Our third story begins with five school children Macy, Chip, Sara, Schrader, and Rhonda. Four of the children are going from home to home asking if they can borrow any extra jack-o'-lantern's. They reach Rhonda's house and see that her front yard if full of them. They ask her to borrow some and her and the other four children venture to an abandoned rock quarry. Macy tells the children the tale of the tragic bus accident that happened one Halloween afternoon 30 years before.

The story is that a school bus containing 8 mentally disturbed children who had to be chained to their seats were on their way home when the driver took a different route. The parents of the children could no longer bear the burden of their mentally ill children so they pooled their money together to pay the bus driver to kill them. As the bus driver checked all of their chains, one of the children escaped and got into the drivers seat and drove the bus into the lake.

The bus driver was the only survivor and was never heard from again. Macy planned to take 8 pumpkins down to the quarry to remember them. So Macy, Sara, and Schrader rode the elevator down and Rhonda and Chip were the next to go down. When Rhonda and Chip reached the bottom they heard screams and Rhonda went to investigate. She saw Schrader's mask floating in the water and then three people started running towards her wearing chains and masks.

Rhonda ran and tripped and hit her head. When she woke up the kids told her it was all a joke. That is until Macy kicked a pumpkin into the water. They started hearing voices and strange noises. The kids started screaming as the children that died in the bus accident came out of the water and attacked them. Rhonda was the only one who...

Our final story takes us into a costume shop with Laurie, her sister, and their friends. They are trying on costumes and recruiting people to come to a Halloween party in the woods. Laurie stays behind at the party in town while her sister and friends go to the woods. Her sister calls and tells her to get there soon. Laurie tells her she'll be there as she catches someone in a dark costume staring at her from across the street.

Laurie leaves and walks into the woods where the party is being held. She runs into the man in the black costume who is a vampire, he pushes her into a tree and proceeds to bite her neck. Moments later at the party, a body wearing a red cape, which is what Laurie was wearing, falls from the trees. Everyone stops and Laurie's sister lifts the cape to reveal the vampire underneath.

Laurie appears seconds later and is scolded for being late. The vampire asks for help and one of Laurie's friends takes off the mask and reveals that is Steven Wilkins (the school principal) and then takes out his fake fangs. Laurie tells Wilkins that it's her first time when all of the girls at the party start transforming into werewolves and she starts eating him.

The conclusion of the anthology takes us to Mr. Kreeg's house. He hates everything that has to do with Halloween and enjoys scaring the local children when they come to his door and stealing their candy. Kreeg's dog Spite hears noises in the house and leads him upstairs to his bedroom where he sees a pumpkin on a night stand and the words "Trick or Treat" written all over his walls.

He is standing by his bed when he gets stabbed in the leg. He falls to the floor and Sam comes out from underneath the bed and the two start to fight. Crag tries to shoot Sam and shoots the pumpkin instead. The light goes out in the pumpkin and Sam disappears. Crag starts walking down the stairs when he trips on candy that was lying on the steps. He tumbles to the bottom and the two struggle again, and this time Crag manages to pull the sack off of Sam's head, revealing his head to look like a cross between a jack-o-lantern and a skull. Crag throws him against the wall and sees his neighbor Mr. Wilkins outside and yells for help but Wilkins goes inside his house.

Sam attacks him again and Crag gains the upper hand and shoots Sam, seemingly killing him. As Crag dials 911 Sam attacks him again, stabbing at him with a large pumpkin lollipop. It lodges into a candy bar that was lying on Kreeg's chest. After finally receiving his treat, Sam eats the candy bar and then leaves the house. Meanwhile, the pictures burning slowly in the fire show a class photo of the children that died in the "School Bus Massacre", and the bus driver was Crag himself.  Later that night, after being bandaged from his encounter with Sam, Crag answers the door to trick or treaters and gives them candy. While outside he sees Sam go to Emma and Henry's  house and then...

And then?? I guess you'll have to watch “Trick 'r Treat” on Netflix and find out huh?? I don't even know where to start about this movie!! The fact that it was an anthology of four different stories but somehow they were all linked together by Sam was awesome. And Sam was sooo freaking cute!! Walking around with his big 'ol pumpkin/skull head and his little orange footie pajamas.

If I ever saw him, I'd probably wanna give him a hug! Wow, that was random, back to my thoughts about the movie. I liked how all of the stories were separate but they all tied in together somehow, other than with Sam. There was a shit ton of blood, some boob shots, awesome death scenes (You ever seen anyone get killed with a lollipop?? It was awesome!) and werewolves.

OMIGOD the werewolves were just great and totally unexpected. I never saw that coming! I was so surprised. The scene where the girls turned into werewolves was probably the absolute best werewolf transformation sequence ever. I mean, they just ripped their skin off and there was fur underneath...and the eyes and fangs...Ugh! It was incredible really.

The movie was very well scripted and had just a touch of humor and some irony thrown in, which you don't see too often in the horror genre. Overall I'd give this movie a 5 out of 5. Now I very rarely give perfect scores, but this movie rocked my fuzzy Steeler socks. The plot was just amazing. I don't think I've ever seen anything like it. I would most definitely recommend this movie to anyone, it's perfect to watch on a Halloween night. And since you're here creeping, stop by Zane's part of world and see what he's got on the slab. You'll be glad you did!

                                   

READY FOR A HOWLIN GOOD TIME?? By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey horror fans!! Sasha Slaughter here with you for the final week of September...can you believe September is almost over?? But the good news is that October is quickly approaching, and we all know what October means..HALLOWEEN!! It's me and Zane's favorite, and we are sure to be bringing you some screams!!! But more on that later. Now it's time to get to the task at hand. Today for your reading pleasure I'll be reviewing, “Fear Itself Episode 9: Something with Bite.”  It was written by Max Landis and directed by Ernest Dickerson.

Now this should be episode 7 but it's actually episode 9, so bear with me. And I don't know why, but for some reason they aren't numbered right on Netflix. And here's a little info for you, NBC stopped airing Fear Itself after the eighth episode. There were 13 episodes in season 1, but only eight of them aired on television. Episodes 9-13 were produced but never aired in the United States. But you can find all 13 episodes on dvd and Netflix, so check that out! Now let's get to it!

 “Something With Bite,” is a story of veterinarian Wilbur Orwell, who works in an animal clinic with his employee Mikayla and Geoff. Dr. Orwell is a lazy slob that does half ass work and eats a lot (num nums!!!). When an unknown animal gets brought into his clinic, Dr. Orwell examines it and a man tells him that he hit it and decided to bring it to his clinic.

When trying to tend to the animal, he finds a collar with the name Michael on it. Suddenly, Dr. Orwell gets bitten by it and then the animal quickly dies. After he's bitten, Dr. Orwell feels ill but the following morning upon waking, he feels like a whole new person. He finds that he no longer has a taste for junk food and also has incredibly heightened senses.

 He goes to work on examining the body of the beast and finds that it has pierced ears and a filling in it's mouth. He finds Mikayla at the reception desk talking to a distraught couple. They introduce themselves as Crane and Moonflower Dougdale (Sounds like hippies to me). The Dougdale's tell Dr. Orwell that they are looking for their son, which they quickly correct and say they are looking for their animal. They say he went missing and fear he's been hit by a car. Orwell takes them to an exam room and shows them Michael's body. They plead with Orwell to please let them have the body so they can do a proper burial and Dr. Orwell reluctantly agrees.

After the couple leaves, Dr. Orwell calls lazy employee Geoff, who rarely shows up for his job. Geoff tells him that things have come up but promises he will be in the following day. Later that night, Orwell's arm starts to itch and he removes the bandage to discover that the bite has healed. He starts twitching and screaming and turns into a werewolf.

 He runs from his house and finds Geoff walking alone on the street. He jumps out in front of Geoff and kills him. He wakes up the next day and finds muddy paw prints leading from the window to the bed. He goes to work and is later questioned by an FBI agent about the death of his employee Geoff. The agent shows Orwell crime scene photos of Geoff's various body parts scattered around the crime scene. Orwell gets nervous and realizes that he may have been the cause of Geoff's death.

Orwell goes to visit the Dougdale's to talk to them about what happened. He tells Moonflower he's there to pay his condolences to Michael. He then looks at her and smiles and his eyes turn yellow. She smiles back at him and her eyes turn bright green. They are sitting down talking when Crane asks Wilbur if he's been able to control the change. Wilbur tells him he thinks he's able to now but then asks if it's possible to kill people in his wolf form. Crane tells him that he wouldn't do anything as a wolf that he wouldn't do as a man. Comforted by this, he then asks if they are the ones responsible for the recent string of animal attack deaths. They deny being involved and tell him that they are vegans. Crane then tells him that there are others out there like them who are less well behaved.

 Back at the clinic, Mikayla is getting ready to leave for the night when she is attacked by a wolf but survives. Orwell goes to visit her and the FBI agent shows up. He tells Orwell that she's lucky she’s still alive and that there was a patrol car right up the road from where she was attacked. Orwell starts acting strange and sniffing at Mikayla and quickly leaves the room.

He follows the scent to an abandoned warehouse where he transforms into a werewolf and meets a man named Forest J. Caldwell. Caldwell keeps telling Orwell that he is beautiful and that he has been waiting all his life to be changed. He keeps telling Orwell to bite him but Orwell never moves. Caldwell admits that he's the one who has been killing people in hopes of attracting attention from a werewolf. He shows Orwell the outfit he made of fur and razor sharp claws. Orwell still doesn't respond and when Caldwell mentions Mikayla and the fact that he didn't have a chance to kill her and that he was thinking of going to the hospital to do it, Orwell rips him apart and....

 Ohh nooo!!! And then what?? If you really want to know, go to Netflix and watch “Fear Itself: Something with Bite.”  This episode was ok I guess. Orwell got on my ever loving nerves. I can't quite put my finger on it, but he bothered me. The acting was a smidge over the top, especially the acting of Wilbur's wife Patty...that woman was horrible. Ughh!!!

There wasn't a whole lot of blood, but there was a few severed body parts, which is always a plus! And the werewolf thing was a little creepy, but it looked too fake. The hippies were kind of strange. And the guy hippie...eww his eyebrows got on my nerves. I wanted to take some hot wax to those bad boys!!!

Overall I'd give “Something to Bite” a 2 out of 5. I was kind of bored throughout the whole thing and wasn't very intrigued by what was happening. And the ending was totally LAME!!! It definitely could have been better. I doubt I'd ever watch this episode again. Once was enough, for sure!! And since you're here, how about you go see what Zane's got going on?? Whatever it is, I'm sure it'll blow your minds. Trust us. We're professionals.

Sasha Slaughter

I'M HOWLIN' FOR YOU BY: ZOMBIE 'MR. SAXOBEAT' ZANE

What’s up horror fans that sit up all night thinking of ways to become one of the cool kids. Guess it’s time to post something. I’ve been a bit behind as of late, burning my candle at both ends I guess. But what are ya gonna do? Complain. I would but who really gives a fuck.

Man, I ate too much today. My stomach is full and I think I might need to take a crap. I’ll try to get through this post first though.                                                              
                                                                                         

                                                                         
10 minutes later....


Ok, I couldn’t hold it. I left a log. Is this tmi? I’m sorry. Let’s get to today’s post shall we? I was gonna save this post until we did out werewolf week, but as I said, I’ve been really busy so fuck it. I’m gonna post it now.

What I got here is ten really kick ass werewolf movies you should check out.  I kinda think that werewolf movies get overlooked a bit.  Not sure why. I like ‘em. I always have.  But I’m not talking about those lame-ass Twatlight werewolves. Nosir! I’m talking the eat your ass, slash your throat, fuck you up kinda werewolf.  So here, take a look at these films. See what you think of my list. If you like it, you rock! If you don’t, then fuck off outta here and make your own list. Just joking. It’s my inner Chef Ramsey.  Love me some HK!  Ok, here's the list....

                                                                         
10.  GINGERSANPS 2: UNLEASHED (2004)   The second installment in the ‘GINGERSNAPS’ trilogy. Not near as good as the first one, but sequels rarely are.
                                                    
9.  UNDERWORLD (2003) It kinda has a love story theme going on, but the werewolves in this movie are bad-ass!  They would kick the shit out of Jacob and the other Twatlight wolves.

8.  NIGHT OF THE WEREWOLF (1981) This is very cheesy, very over the top, but it has a ton of nudity!  Not that that matters...Well, kinda it does.

7.  WOLFEN (1981) This one here is kinda on the arts-fartsy side. Not your typical werewolf film, but it’s worth 2hrs of your time.

6. THE HOWLING (1981) Classic werewolf film! Plus it stars E.T.’s mom! What’s not to like?
                                                                

5.  THE WOLFMAN (1941) The grandfather of all werewolf films. This is where it all began. Universal monster movies really set the stage. Go look in our old shit, we did a whole month dedicated to old school horror. You’ll love it.

4.  DOG SOLDIERS (2002) This movie is really a fun watch.  Lot’s of killing, lot’s of gore, lot’s of foul fuckin’ language.  A great British horror movie, y’all. Look into it.

3.  GINGERSNAPS (2000) ...”Your gonch is showing...” A really different take on the whole werewolf thing.  Plus it’s a chick who turns into a wolf and not a dude. So it gets cool points there.  If you don’t see any of these movies on this list but one, this is the one ya need to see.
                                                                                                              

                                                                                                                
2.  SILVER BULLET (1985) A Stephen King adaptation that he actually wrote the script for. This is another five star werewolf movie and a must see if you haven’t already.  But really, if you haven’t seen this yet, ya got no bussy here. Go educate yourself lame horror fan and come back and see me another time.  On second thought, stay with.  Hang with Sasha and I. We’ll show ya the ropes.

1.  AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON (1981) That’s right, one more from 1981. This John Landis directed film is hands down the best. The transformation scenes are cool as hell, especially for its time. There’s enough blood and gore for the bloodthirsty viewers, this movie has it all. And if you like naked David Naughton...this film is perfect for you!  

Ok, there’s my list. I guess that’s all I got for you today, if you didn’t like this post, then I’ll try and do better tomorrow. Or maybe I won’t.  And make sure you go and trip with Sasha a bit. I hear she’s tripping on ‘shrooms and showing her box.


Before I get outta here, here's some cool werewolf images that I thought you may enjoy. So feast your eyes about and enjoy any of the other enjoyments (remember that line, sis?) on this page. Until next time, take care, stay a-scared and I am out!




                  

The Werewolf Woman

Sadie Frost gettin' it from a werewolf

                                                                                 

                                    

DOG SOLDIERS

                                                                      

SASHA SLAUGHTER AS A WEREWOLF