SHREW YOU BUDDY!

AIN’T NUTTIN’ BUT A GANGSTA PARTY...Ok, not really. Let me start again. COMING TO YA LIVE AND DIRECT FROM THE SEVEN SIX ONE OH SEVEN. There. That was better wasn’t it? Anywho, Zombie Fuckin Zane here once again to entertain you. Or annoy you. Or both. So this week Sasha and I are still on our old school horror kick and we got some good shit for ya. Last week we did a Bela Lugosi type of thing and this week, we’re gonna be doing an old school monster movie type of thing. Ya know, ‘The Wolfman,’ ‘Creature of the Black Lagoon’ ‘The Killer Shrews’ shit like that. Sounds neat huh? I thought you’d like it. And if not...SUCK IT! (Ok, I promise I’ll stop saying that soon enough. But it’s funny to me still.)

So what I got for your ass’ today is my take on the film ‘THE KILLER SHREWS.’ Have you seen it? Better yet, have you even heard of this motherfucker? I came across this film in one of my many horror movie sets. Ya know, those 50 movie sets put out by Mill Creek? Anyway, this film was in one of my sets so I figured fuck it. Let’s have some cold beer and see what’s up with ‘THE KILLER SHREWS.’ Wanna hear about it? Cool. So let us cut the foreplay and get to the good stuff.

‘THE KILLER SHREWS’ is a 1959 sci-fi film directed by Ray Kellogg. It’s classified as sci-fi, but to me, it’s more of a horror/monster movies. I mean, HELLO! Giant shrews are total monsters. Right? This film is actually considered a cult classic which earns it a few extra cool points. It was released on June 25, 1959 and runs just about an hour and ten minutes. It stars James Best as Capt. Thorne Sherman, Ingrid Goude as Ann Cragis and Ken Curtis as Jerry Farrel. (Who, btw, was an annoying prick in the film and I was glad he died. SPOILER ALERT!)

Now ya got the particulars, lemme give you the plot.

Here’s what we got plot wise: This scientist guy is staying on an island working on a project to aid with the worlds population issue. Ya know, too many people and not enough resources type of thing. So he fucks about in his lab and accidently creates a hoard of giant shrews. Not sure what that has to do with world population control, but whatever. Actually I do know. I remember now. The scientist guy had a theory that if we were smaller, we’d consume less and therefore be able to not use up all of our natural resources. Or some shit like that. Anyway, the giant shrews have no more food left on the island, so they decide to eat the scientist and his guests. Obviously not wanting to be shrew chew, (lol, that was funny. Shrew chew. Hey? You didn’t think that was funny? Whatever. You know it was. You can laugh. It’s ok.) Not wanting to be SHREW CHEW, the scientist and his daughter and Capt. Sherman try to escape the island. Will they make it? You’ll have to watch and find out.

As far as what I thought about this film, I gotta tell ya I kinda dug it. Man I did. It was easy to watch, not to complicated, and the giant shrews were pretty amusing. I had a good time checking it out. Maybe the Bud Light had something to do with it. I don’t know. But I was expecting some kinda retarded-ass B movie. And on some levels it was, but all in all it was an enjoyable movie to watch. Now this is the part where I run down some of the stats but these older movies just don’t have the body counts, the nekkidness, the fuck scenes, the gore...they weren’t made that way back in the day. But what I can give you, is my score. And that’s the one that matters anyway, right?

Without further ramblings, here’s the what I give ‘THE KILLER SHREWS.’ On a scale of 1-5
(1 being a shit pile and 5 being awesome) I have to give this cult classic a solid 3. At first I was gonna go 2.5 but in retrospect, I bumped it up a little. So you should look into watching it. It’s definitely worth a view.
That’s all I got for ya today. Be sure and check out Sasha’s stuff as well. She’d be glad to show it to you. Until next time, take care, stay a-scared and I am out.