BRAINS!!!!!!!!!!! Hey there!! Sasha Slaughter here with you for the final time this week and for the final day of random stuff month. Since I reviewed a zombie movie yesterday, I figured why not stay with the zombie theme. So, I'm going to list the top 5 reasons why I love zombies. I guess that kinda explains the whole "BRAINS" opening a little better huh?? I've always been fascinated by zombies, ever since I was a teenager and saw "Night of the Living Dead" (The original) for the first time. After that I was hooked. I don't know what their appeal is to me, but zombies are hands down my favorite monster. RAWR!!! So kick back and enjoy top 5 reasons why I love zombies!!!
5.) They fuck shit up. They cause chaos, panic, and disorder. Think about it, in most movies when a zombie apocalypse happens, the whole entire world seemingly shuts down. People leave, they kill themselves out of fear, they end up becoming the very thing they are afraid of or they man the hell up and try to survive. In almost every zombie movie I've ever seen, entire populations are wiped out or they flee somewhere else to get away from the zombies. With all of the chaos and death happening, would you be able to survive a zombie apocalypse? Would you be able to stay calm and get out alive or would you fall victim to the zombies?? I myself don’t do so well with chaos or panic, I'd probably never make it out alive. So I'm really hoping I never have to live through a zombie invasion. Because my pasty white Yankee ass would perish...quickly.
4). All they wanna do is eat your brains..or whatever else they can sink their rotting teeth into. They don't care who you are, where you live, or if they knew you before they died and then became undead. All they wanna do is eat you. They'll munch on your flesh, slurp up your brains and occasionally eat your intestines like spaghetti. Zombies are bad mamma jammas.
3.) I find humor in zombies. The whole concept of being undead and being ravenous for brains is funny to me. You gotta admit, sometimes the zombies in movies do some pretty funny shit. It's especially funny when they make noises. You know, the standard zombie moaning noises. It always cracks me up when they do that. There's just a quality about them that never ceases to amuse me. They could be coming for my brains, and if they make funny noises while doing so, yeah, I'm gonna laugh.
2.) They can be killed....but only by destroying their brains or decapitating them. No stakes in the heart or strings of garlic will keep these flesh hungry stalkers down. You gotta go straight for the thinker if you wanna survive the zombie invasion. Get your guns or axes, whatever you can use to split a zombies head open with. That's your only guaranteed way to survive the undead.1.) Zombies aren't vampires. I'm not crazy about vampires, but I don't hate them either. OK, I'll admit, I'm kind of obsessed with Twilight (I'm a chick, whattya want from me??). But like the movie said, vampires do kind of suck. Especially the new ones. They only drink from animals, they can come out in the daylight and to top it all off, they sparkle in the sun!!! WHAT? But with zombies, they've pretty much stayed true to how they've always been described. Zombies don't sparkle, they can come out whenever the hell they want, and screw animal blood, they want human brains!!! And honestly, who do you think would win in a zombie vs vampire battle royal?? No, vampires don't have blood, but they've got some tasty brains for the zombies to devour. And yeah, the vampires are smarter and faster, but zombies are obviously the more superior monster, to me at least.
So there you have it, my top 5 reasons for loving zombies. I maybe could have thought of more, but that could have taken a while. Making that list took a lot longer than you'd think. Most of the time I sat staring at the computer screen mouth breathing a little. =) But I got it done. If you're a zombie lover like me, or you at least think they're cool, hopefully you could relate to some of the reasons why I effin love zombies so much! Thanks for wasting your time with me! And while you're here, how about you go waste some of your time with Zane too!! And as always, check back tomorrow for new stuff here at Dead End Horror.
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| Sasha Slaughter |
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