If the house is rockin, don't come knockin!! OWWW!!! Well, my house was rocking earlier, and it wasn't because of you're thinkin =) That's right, we felt a little of the shake from the quake....yikes! Anyway, let's get down to it! Today I'll be reviewing Night of the Living Dead...old school right!!?? Well, I've never seen the whole thing, so I decided what the hell, it's got zombies and as you all know, I loves me some brain eatin zombies!! It came out in 1985 and was directed by Dan O' Bannon.
In this horror/comedy two employees from a medical supply company unknowingly release several zombies from cylinders that they've been trapped in for years. It causes local citizens to deal with a large scale zombie epidemic. Frank is showing new employee Freddy the ropes when he mentions that there are bodies in basement that have been there for fourteen years. He tells him that they came from the Army when a chemical seeped into the morgue and brought the dead back to life. The Army attempted to get rid of the problem and accidently shipped the contaminated soil and dead bodies to the medical supply company.
They go into the basement and look at the cylinders. Frank taps on one of them to assure Freddy that they are sturdy and when he does, it breaks causing a chemical gas to be released into the basement and out of the warehouse. The gas causes Freddy and Frank to pass out and when they come to they are both starting to feel sick. They come out of the basement and hear strange noises coming from the warehouse. They go to find that the stuffed dogs they sell to veterinarian school have come to life and then they hear screaming coming from where they keep dead bodies.
A colonel from the Army is talking to his wife about finding the missing bodies. He tells her he can't rest until they are found and that they could be anywhere. While Freddy and Frank try to figure out what the noises are, his friends are waiting in the graveyard for him to get off of work. They all want to party but don't have anywhere to go so they take a radio to the graveyard and hang out. (And then comes the part with the creepy red head named "Trash" dancing naked on a grave...I guess that's supposed to iconic or something??). Anyway, Frank decides to call his boss Burt and tell him what happened.
When Burt arrives Frank explains what happened. They tell him about the screams coming from where the dead bodies are kept. They come up with a plan to kill the cadaver and then destroy the evidence. Frank opens the door and the cadaver runs out headed straight for Burt. They catch it and bury a pick axe into it's brain but it wont die. So Burt decides to chop it up in pieces. He tells Frank and Freddy that he has a friend that runs a mortuary and he's going to ask him to help them. Burt goes to the morgue and asks his friend Ernie (Haha...Burt and Ernie!) for help. At first he tells him there are rabid weasels in the bag and they need to destroy them. But when Burt says he'll take them outside and shoot them Burt finally tells him what's actually in the bag. He shows Ernie the body parts and Ernie agrees to help him by burning the parts in the incinerator.
As the body is being burned the chemical gas is released into the air and then it starts to rain. Freddy's friends are in the graveyard when the rain starts and they run to their car yelling that the rain is burning their skin. As the rain soaks into the ground, it begins to bring corpses back to life. Tina goes to the medical warehouse to look for Freddy and she goes into the basement. One of the things from the cylinders attacks her yelling that it wants her brains. Her friends come and rescue her and they all leave the warehouse and run back into the graveyard. Trash gets attacked by zombies (Thankfully, I was tired of seeing that bitch naked) and the rest of her friends escape. Three of them manage to make it to the mortuary when Ernie calls 911 and asks for paramedics to come because there are two men that are poisoned.
The EMT's show up and can't get a pulse or blood pressure Frank or Freddy. They say that their body temperature is 70 degrees and that it's not normal. The EMT's go to get stretchers when they are attacked by zombies. Freddy's friends make it to the mortuary and tell Burt that there are bodies all over the place and that they're killing people. They begin boarding up the mortuary to keep the zombies out. When questioned about what's wrong with Frank and Freddy, Burt finally admits that a chemical was released when Frank and Freddy were messing with the cylinders in the basement. He tells them that the chemical gas escaped and they both breathed it in and it's causing them to get sick.
Frank and Freddy complain of stiffness and pain and Ernie checks them and says that they are starting to exhibit signs of rigor mortis and that they are dying. Just then zombies break into the mortuary and kill one of Freddy's friends. Ernie grabs the zombie and straps it to a table in the embalming room. It starts talking and tells him that they want to eat their brains because it takes the pain of being dead away. They decide to lock Freddy and Frank in the chapel incase they turn into zombies. Tina insists on being locked in the room with Freddy. Shortly after they are locked in, Freddy turns into a zombie and tries to attack Tina. Ernie comes into the room and grabs her and they try and board the doors shut. Right before Frank turns into a zombie he puts himself in the incinerator to die.
Burt and Spider go outside and get in a cop car to try and get help. They end up at the warehouse and call the cops. The cops set up a barricade to try and stop whatever was happening but the zombies break through and start killing all of the cops. Back at the mortuary, only Ernie and Tina are left so they block themselves into the attic to keep from being killed. Burt finally realizes that no one is coming to help so he calls the number on the cylinders in the basement. He gets patched through to Colonel Glover and explains to him what's happening. Colonel Glover calls the General and tells him that they've found the cylinders in Louisville, KY but they have been opened. Burt is told that the Army had a plan in place to deal with the cylinders incase they were to be opened. The Army then lines up a missle and....
BOOOM!! What?? Idk, watch and see what happens dammit! Now, let's see what I thought shall we?? Ehh.. I gotta say, it's super cheesy. The acting is wayyyy over the top and the characters in the movie definitely look 80's! Too funny. I guess because I'm "new school" I'm not really used to seeing old stuff like that. That movie is older than me! I think overall I'd give it a 2.5 out of 5. I love zombies and everything, but this movie was one giant cheese doodle man! I know it was made in the 80's and everything, but yeesh! I will admit that the special effects were kinda cool. That zombie thing from they cylinder was creepy, except for the face. That made me laugh. It's eyes were all funny looking. Didn't really match the body, you know what I'm saying??
And the zombie skeleton writhing on the table bitching about wanting to eat brains was pretty cool too. I must say though, that red haired girl was kind of annoying. Not only was her acting bad, I was tired of seeing her naked. JEEZ! She was naked for practically the whole movie. I was tired of seeing her boobs, butt and vadge!! GROSS! There was a good amount of blood and brain matter, which was great and the zombies looked kinda creepy. It was all good except for that naked red haired bitch. For real! Now you know my thoughts, how about you go on and see what Zane is thinking?? Thanks for stopping by! We appreciate it mucho!
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| SASHA SLAUGHTER |
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