Hello Dead End Horror fans that like to bake gingerdead cookies and hang mistletoe from your crotches. What’s good? Well, sadly, this is gonna be our last post until January 2nd. Sasha and I are shutting it down for the holidays. Not that we don’t want you to come and visit, by all means stop on by and read some of our old shit. We’d love it.
Anyway, hope everyone out there has their shopping done and whatnot. Me, eh, I’ll get it done one way or another. And by the way, please feel free to send us some shit too. Sasha and I do enjoy/appreciate presents. You can contact us @ deadendhorror.hushmail.me. So please feel free to bestow upon us plenty of goodies.
Well, I don’t really have anything horror for yous today. Hope everyone enjoyed some of the Christmas horror shit we did put out there. Those songs were funny, yes? And we did talk about some pretty good movies as well. So if you want, go back and check out those posts if you haven’t done so already.
Before I get outta here, I just wanna wish everyone a very Happy Holidays and a very Merry Christmas. Y’all be safe out there okay. I know with all the parties and shit some of yous enjoy a bit of drink. Just be cool and call a cab or something if you are too totaled to drive. Don’t fuck about, okay.
So I guess that’s about it. So until next year, this is Zombie Zane and Sasha Slaughter wishing everyone a very Happy Holidays and a Merry Christmas. C-ya next year!
Hello Dead End Horror fans that aspire to be underwear models and antichrist’s. What’s good? Okay, so this post is gonna be a little bit different. There’s a fuckin’ surprise, huh? Anyway, I was gonna do a movie review, but decided against it at the last moment. Why? Let me explain before you piss and moan.
One more thing, this post really has not jack shit to do with anything horror. I know, I know, you’re askin’ what the fuck are you doin’ Zombie Zane? Well allow me to retort. Now I know that you have come to expect horror and gross shit. But not to worry, I got the gross shit covered.
With the holiday season approaching, as you know, we, at DEH have been doing Christmas themed horror movies. Kinda giving you an alternative to the hum-drum old-school Christmas movies. So I thought that it would be a good idea to share with you some nasty versions of Christmas music. So, if you hold these songs sacred, then this is where you should fuck off outta here.
Now for me, I find these songs funny as shit. But then again, I have a really morbid sense of humor. So without further ado, here are some nasty as hell Christmas songs that you can sing around the piano while sipping some egg nog. Enjoy!
HAH! That was awesome! Ok, let's try this one...
Well, that was just aces! I love it! See, see how much fun an alternative Christmas can be! Let's do another one, yes?
YIKES! Have you laughed yet? I hope so. Told ya I had the gross and raunchy shit covered. Are you offended? I hope so! Here's another carol!
I LOVE IT! The first part was my favorite. I made Sasha listen to all these last night. Especially this next one. Check it out....
LOVE ME SOME FARTS! Farts are still funny! Ok, Last one and then I gotta go. Places to see and people to do, but let's enjoy this one before we say good-bye....
LOL! Wasn't this fun? I do love some Christmas music. Anyway, that's all I got for today. Be sure and go and visit Sasha. She's most likely roasting Chet's nuts on an open fire. If it ain't Chet, I'm sure it's Brad...or Steve...or...who knows. But I'm sure she's roasting something.
So until tomorrow, take care, stay a-scared and I am out! Peace peace and between the sheets grease!
Hello Dead End Horror fans that stay up all night searching for the nastiest shit you can think of online. What’s good? MAN, whatta a fucking weekend here, at DEH. The lovely Sasha Slaughter had her home overtaken by strange, mushroom like people. And me, Zombie Zane, watched my New York Football Giants defeat the Dallas Cowbitches. Tony Romo, what a twat waffle. So needless to say, I’m in a pretty good mood today.
So, I guess this is where I tell you what we got coming out this week. But before I do that, let me give you a little heads up about what’s gonna go down with us over the Christmas break. (If the word Christmas offends you, go fuck yourself. I hope that was offensive to you as well. Fuckin’ people who get all bent out of shape when they hear or see the word, CHRISTMAS. What dumb-fucks those kinda people are.)
Sorry, ranting! I’m in a good mood. Not sure where that came from. Anyway, our schedule over the CHRISTMAS break is gonna go like this. We’ll post shit like normal this week. Monday-Friday. Next week, we’re gonna post on Monday only and that will be it until sometime after January 1st. I know, I know, it’s totally sad and you are all bumming. But hey, Sasha and I do get into the CHRISTMAS spirit too. So there ya go. This week, all new shit, next week, Monday post and then we shut it down for a couple weeks.
But let’s focus on this week for now. I think Sasha is gonna be reviewing a few Christmas horror movies, “Childs Play” and something she found form like the 1950's. I’m pretty geeked about that. So be sure and check back this week. Like everyday. Multiple times if you please.
As far as me, I’m gonna give you 5 more holiday horror movies you can watch for a more alternative holiday. I’m also gonna review something, not sure what yet but you can bet your fucking ass’ that’s it’s gonna be damn good. After all, I am a professional.
So, there ya have it. A look at the week ahead here at DEH. So be sure and visit us as often as you like. The more the better. You may just catch Sasha doing something freaky-deaky with the fat man in the red suit. So until tomorrow, take care, stay a-scared, and I am out! Peace peace and Rudolph grease!
Hello Dead End Horror fans that eat Smashburgers late at night while listening to renditions of ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town.’ Happy Holidays, slimes. So, what do you wanna talk about today? I’m having a fuck of a time trying to think about what to write about. Fucking writer’s block. Maybe I need a drink...Gimmie a sec would ya?
Ok, back on target. I still haven’t a clue what I’m gonna write about, but at least now I feel a bit looser. One or ten more of these and I may be typing the rest of this naked. YIKES! Now that’s what I call fucking horror!
So, I think what I’m gonna do is give you a list of 10 holiday horror movies you can watch. I mean I was gonna do a review on, “The Children” which is a kick-ass holiday horror movie, but fuck it. I’ll do that one next week. One more quick thing, I said 10 movies, but this post will have 5. I’m gonna split it into two different posts. Why? Not sure. Because I can I guess. But 5 is better than none. And besides, I don’t wanna overload you with too much info all at once. That and I damn sure don’t wanna type too much info all at once. So let’s cut out the foreplay and get to the list.
Sorry, one more thing of note. These movies are like in no particular order. Like I didn’t rank them or anything. But I will give you my score at the end of each film. Cool? Cool. Okay, now we’ll get to the list.....
5. “Silent Night, Bloody Night” (1974)An oldie but a goody. What’s not to like about an escaped maniacal killer stalking people trying to sell an old mansion? Nothing! This film is old but it does have that grainy, 1970's quality to it so it kinda rocks on that level. A solid 2.25 out of 5 for me.
4. “Child’s Play” (1988)Directed by Tom Holland, this little film has inspired several sequels and has developed a cult following over the years. Love this film! The other one’s not so much, but this one, fuck yeah! And YES! It is a Christmas horror movie. It takes place over Christmas. So it counts! BOO! I give Chucky a 4 out of 5.
3. “Gremlins” (1984) I talked about this film earlier in the week. So I won’t say much here about it. All I can tell you is that this is a great film and it never gets old. I totally own this motherfucker and you should too. Ask Santa for it if you don’t have a copy. “Gremlins” 5 out of 5!
2. “Santa Claws” (1996)If you like low budget horror and a ton of tits and ass, then this is the perfect holiday horror movie for you. It was written and directed by James Russo (co-writer of Night of the Living Dead) in case you wanted to know. And in case you didn’t. Anyway, great film, entertaining, and silly as hell. I give it a 3.75. What can I say? I liked it.
1. “Night Train Murders” (1975)Ok, now this thing is very similar to ‘Last House on the Left.’ But in my opinion, it’s way more brutal. It’s about a couple of college girls headed home for the Christmas holiday. Anyway, they get raped and brutalized while on the train. So eventually the culprits that did the raping meet one of the girl’s dad and well...you can guess. Very brutal, very different and very not family friendly. A 3.5 out of 5 for this one.
And there you have it. 5 kick ass holiday horror movies for your viewing enjoyment. So deck the halls and all that other shit. Hope you watch some of these over the weekend. You’ll enjoy them. Trust me, I’m a professional.
Until next time, take care, stay a-scared, and I am out! Peace peace and elf jizzum grease.
