SOMTIMES THEY REALLY DO COME BACK..BITCHES By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Hey there creepy readers that search for Willem Dafoe's penis. Pervs. Unfortunately, this article isn't about his penis, you may have to get off elsewhere. Or you could always stick around and get your mind blown =). Yes, it is yours truly Sasha Slaughter, entertaining you for the final time this week. Aww come on now, don't be sad. Zane'll be here tomorrow! Since our Stephen King tribute week is still going on, I thought I'd review a movie titled "Sometimes they come back". "Sometimes they come back" was a made for television horror flim based on a short story of the same name. It stars Tim Matheson, Brooke Adams, and Robert Rusler. It was directed by Tom McLoughlin and written by Stephen King (short story), Lawrence Konner, and Mark Rosenthal. So let me tell you a little about it huh?

Jim Norman moves back to his old hometown after being offered a job there. It was the last place Jim wanted to go, but under the circumstances, it's what he had to do to support his family. He moved away from the town twenty-seven year prior, after the horrific death of his older brother Wayne. He witnessed his brother being murdered by a group of greasers back in 1963 and hasn't been back since. The gang was murdered shortly afterward when their car, that was parked on the train tracks, was hit while they were inside. Shortly after starting his teaching job at the high school, Jim begins having nightmares about his brothers accident and the gang that killed him. Students that are close to him begin being involved in various accidents that look like suicides. One by one, as his students die, they are replaced by the greasers, disguised as new students in his class.

The greasers plan to kill Jim the same way they murdered Wayne in order to keep themselves from going to hell. They also plan on having a child witness the event, Jim's son Scott is who they have in mind. And the gang needs the remaining living member of the gang, Carl Mueller, who left just before the train struck the car. The gang harasses Jim's family in order to make sure he'll fulfill his promise and meet them where everything took place 27 years ago. Jim takes his wife and son to church where they'll be safe while he goes to find the gang. The gang eventually finds his wife son and lures them out of church and take them with them to the train tracks. Jim attempts to bring his brother back in a graveyard, but realizes there is something stopping him. It is then that Jim realizes that in order to bring back his brother, he has to cooperate with the gang and reenact the murder. Does Jim finally get the peace he has been searching for or do the greasers get their one ticket out of hell?

Ooooh!! The suspense is killin me smalls! Ohh, wait. It's not, I already know what happens. But those of you that haven't seen this movie don't, so go watch it! This was a decent film. Not a whole lot of gore or anything, but I think it was meant to be more of a ghost story type deal, with not alot of gore or violence. There were some semi gross scenes..but I won't give those away, you'll have to see for yourselves. The acting was good, and the plot was solid also. The greaser guys were mean little, vengeful bastards. But the one that laughed all the time, that high pitched annoying laugh...ughhh. But I guess it kinda went with the story..seeing as how they were all evil and stuff, trying to kill Jim and get out of hell. Overall I'd give "Sometimes they come back" a 3.5 out of 5. It's a pretty good ghost story type film and it kept me entertained throughout. And can I add that that car is beautiful! Yowza! Anyway, not one of my favorite Stephen King adaptations, but it's pretty good nonetheless. And while you're here, don't forget to peep out what Zane's got going on! Thanks for stopping by!

HAIL TO THE FUCKING KING! BY: ZOMBIE ZANE

Hello Dead End Horror fans that do jumping jacks in the nude while listening to the golden oldies radio station. What’s poppin' slimes? Anyway, as you may or may not be privy to, this week Sasha and I are all about Stephen King. We figured this was long overdue. I mean he is the grandfather of horror.

Yesterday, Sasha gave you a top five list of her favorite King adaptations. After reading it, I figured what the fuck, I wanna do one too! So, let’s cut out the foreplay and let me share with you my favorite King adaptations....

ZOMBIE ZANE’S TOP 5 STEPHEN KING ADAPTATIONS

5.  Stand By Me (1986) This film was adapted from a novella titled, “The Body.” One of my favorite films of all time. I’m sure all you are familiar with this one, if not, REALLY? Leave this post right now and go watch it. The barfing scene is one of the best scenes ever! “...LARD-ASS! LARD-ASS! LARD-ASS!” 

4.  Christine (1983) Again, I’m sure all of yous are familiar with this one as well. Like if you’re not, shit...I don’t know...Maybe this is a good time for you to crawl out under that rock and start watching some of these movies. This movie is full of cool shit. The flaming car chasing Buddy Repperton, one of the creepiest scenes in the movie. And by the way, this film was directed by John Carpenter. 

3.  The Green Mile (1999) Not of the horror variety, but still, classic fucking King. “...Take my hand, boss...” Remember that line? This is a totally great film. In fact, it makes my top 25 list of the best movies ever. The acting, the plot, I could write a 2000 word essay why this movie kicks ass. So if you haven’t seen this film and read the book, fuck off outta here and go do so. 

2.  IT (1990) This thing was a television miniseries so it’s uber long. But don’t let that detour you. Like this is one adaptation that was damn near just as good as the book. Not quite as good, but close. There ain’t nothing scarier than a killer clown in the sewers. Fucking Pennywise is a bad motherfucker. Tim Curry did a hella good job! Kudos to him. 

1. Salem’s Lot (1979) Another TV miniseries but whatever. I fucking LOVE this movie! Love it! It scared the shit out of me when I was a kid. I’ll never forget the first time I saw the floating kid vampires. (The Glick brothers) All around the vampires in this film look bad-ass! Like I know it’s old, but shit! Awesome film. 

Well, there you go. My top 5 King adaptations. I know I left out some good ones, but there’s my list, take it or fuck off. Anywho, be sure and keep checking back all the week for more Stephen King shit. And also, be sure to drop over and see the ebbing out of existence Sasha Slaughter.

Until next time, take care, stay a-scared, and I am out! See you on the flip side.

TOP 5 STEPHEN KING ADAPTATIONS...WHAT WHAT!! By: SASHA SLAUGHTER

Guess who's back??? That's right DEH fans!! Zane and I are back and ready to rock your world! I know you've missed us...and we've missed you too! Yes, even you creepy weirdos who search for gross stuff. So this week Zane and I will be doing a little Stephen King tribute. The man is a legend as far as I'm concerned. One of my favorite authors for sure. 'Christine' was the first novel I've ever read by him, and from that moment I was hooked. Ok, enough walk down memory lane bullshit, let's get to it. Today I'll be giving you a top 5 list of my favorite Stephen King adaptations. Here we go!

5.) Thinner- Billy Halleck is an arrogant upper class lawyer living in suburban Maine. One day, while driving, Billy accidentally runs over an old Gypsy woman with his car. The Gypsy woman's father Tadzu Lempke curses Billy by touching his face and saying the word "Thinner". The curse causes Billy to lose weight rapidly, regardless of what he eats. The man also curses two of Billy's friends who help him avoid punishment for the Gypsy woman's death. Billy realizes that only Lempke himself can undo the curse, and tries desperately to make him do so.

4.) The Stand- A super flu hits the United States and leaves only 0.6 of the population left. The survivors gravitate between either the good side or the evil side. They are driven mainly to do so by having vivid dreams in the aftermath of the plague. Randall Flagg is the ruler of the evil, known as the "Dark Man", who tries to recruit people to join the evil side, where he reigns. Many of the remaining survivors begin to have dreams of Mother Abagail, and she eventually directs them to go to Boulder, Colorado where they begin a to establish a democratic society. Eventually Mother Abagail falls ill, and on her death bed, she instructs a few of the men to go to Las Vegas, Nevada to confront Randall Flagg, where the battle between good and evil begins.

3.) Bag of Bones- Mike Noonan is suffering severe writers block while mourning the death of his pregnant wife Jo. Four years after her death, Mike begins having nightmares that take place at his summer home in Maine. He decides to confront his fears and move to the house. His first day there, he saves a little girl named Kyra from a near accident and meets her mother, Mattie Devore. Mike gets dragged into a custody case between Mattie Devore and Max Devore (Kyra's grandfather). Mike begins to write again and quickly realizes that the ghost of his wife is helping him solve the murder of Sara Tidewell, a blues singer whose ghost is haunting the house.

2.) Rose Red- Dr. Joyce Reardon, a highly unorthodox psychology professor, leads a team of psychics to the massive Seattle mansion known as Rose Red. She is attempting to record data which would constitute proof of paranormal phenomena. The mansion is publicly thought to be haunted, as at least 23 people have died or disappeared there, and when they do, the interior of the house seems to get larger. Reardon's team unleashes a spirit in the house that causes several deaths and a revelation of the mansion's secrets.

1.) Shawshank Redemption- In 1947, banker Andy Dufresne is convicted of murdering his wife and her lover. He is sentenced to two life terms at the Shawshank State Penitentiary in Maine, run by Warden Samuel Norton. Andy befriends a man named Red, and soon realizes that Red has a knack for obtaining contraband. He asks Red to get him a rock hammer, and he does. Red jokes that Andy might use it to try and break out until he sees how small it is. Andy is eventually put in charge of the finances and begins giving financial advice to the guards and the warden. Andy learns from a new inmate named Tommy that he had heard an inmate at another prison claimed to have committed a crime similar to the one Andy was convicted of. When the warden finds out, he has Tommy killed and Andy is thrown into solitary for 2 months. The next day during roll call they find that Andy's cell is empty. When a warden throws a rock through a poster on the wall, it reveals a tunnel dug into the wall.

WHAT WHAT? Who doesn't love Stephen King right??? He's a genius I'm telling you! Hope you enjoyed my top 5 King adaptations, and if you haven't seen them, I highly suggest that you do. They are all amazing! And while you're here, don't forget to check out what Zane's up to...I heard that he faps to The Exorcist....spoooky! Thanks for stopping by Dead End Horror!!!